So yeah, I've been asked to create a plan to launch 8 new teams with only myself as the scrum master, and set them up on a cadence. Oh, and I can only use the hours of 8:30 am to noon central. Oh, and we have no backlogs, but we get a week to build them... Oh, and since we have no product owners, we're just going to take engineers and promote them to product owners, but we're going to use a middle man to communicate with the customer, who may or may not respond to emails...
It's 8:30 and I already need a drink.
Jokes aside...